I am a card-carrying feminist, which, as we all know, really means an angry, shrill, hairy-legged, ugly man-hater with lots of cats and even more bitterness. I am the embodiment of an MRA’s worst nightmare, and proud of it. Join me as I skewer all of the worst examples of toxic masculinity: the “Nice Guys,” the purity fetishists, the mansplainers/manterruptors, the Brogressives, the “free speech absolutists,” the manbabies, the Bernie Bros, the Gamergaters. Because let’s be real, every entitled, whiny asshole needs a good nutcracking every once in a while.

Note: I’m a firm believer that explaining jokes makes them less funny, but here goes. This is all tongue-in-cheek, and is intended as a humorous critique of toxic masculinity rather than men themselves. (Although privileged, white, straight, cis men will be overrepresented in my posts, naturally.) And since I’m not actually a man-hater, I will primarily be discussing fictional characters. And Donald Trump, who counts.